When Sober Curious Strikes Past Dry January

At first of 2025, the previous US Surgeon Common issued an advisory on the hyperlink between alcohol consumption and most cancers threat. Whereas it is a sobering name to motion, there is no such thing as a denying that sober curiosity has elevated lately. From Dry January to extra manufacturers creating alcohol-free drinks to the rise of mainstream mocktails, now greater than ever even informal drinkers have gotten sober curious and analyzing their relationship with alcohol.

Final 12 months in Episode 146 of the FBG Podcast, Sobriety Coach, and Founding father of Sober Wild, Krysty Krywko, Ed.D, joined our EIC Alison for an interview on sobriety. As we speak we’re persevering with this dialog with Krysty. Dry January has handed however definitely not the questions on what we will do if we’re fascinated about a sober (utterly alcohol free), or damp (a discount in alcohol consumption), life. 

Tam: Ought to we method consuming as all or nothing, particularly if we’re sober curious?

Krysty: I feel it’s a really private resolution, however in the event you’re any form of a daily drinker (which means three or 4 nights every week “simply to unwind”) then alcohol is impacting the way in which you are feeling – mentally, emotionally, and bodily – your physique simply doesn’t know there’s one other means. If you happen to’re not consuming throughout the week, however then consuming a few bottles of wine over the weekend, you by no means actually get the prospect to see how your physique and thoughts reacts to no alcohol. Anna Lembke, in her guide, Dopamine Nation: Discovering Stability within the Age of Indulgence, talks about how “abstaining from our drug of selection for not less than 4 weeks offers clarifying behaviors. Perception that merely shouldn’t be attainable whereas we proceed to make use of.” In different phrases, you don’t have any concept how shitty you actually really feel if you’re utilizing a substance that’s making you are feeling shitty. It normally takes a couple of weeks in your physique to regulate to the truth that you’re not consuming a poisonous substance.

Tam: Are there concerns/greatest practices to go from Dry January to extra of a Damp February and past? 

Krysty: So, I don’t actually know the reply to that query, it actually depends upon what your motivation was for Dry January. Was the plan to simply see in the event you might make it with out consuming for 30 days? Or have been you in search of actual well being advantages? Or did you notice that your consuming has elevated over the previous few years and you wanted to take a break?

Moderation, which is basically what Damp February is all about, doesn’t work for lots of people. If you happen to spend a variety of time bargaining with your self each time alcohol is concerned, which results in a variety of “guidelines” round your consuming, you may need to take a step again.

You may not even pay attention to these guidelines. They’ve simply turn into a part of your internal chatter. That chatter may sound like this:
I’m not going to drink on my own.
No consuming earlier than 5:00 p.m.
No laborious alcohol throughout the week
I’m solely going to drink white wine (or beer, or vodka, and many others.)
I can’t have greater than two drinks on every week evening.
I can’t drink greater than two nights in a row. 

The tip days of my consuming have been crammed with elaborate and arcane guidelines that have been continually shifting as I broke one after one other. I used to be letting myself down each day, and that form of self-disappointment was like a continuing stream of micro-cuts to my soul.

Take a second and take into consideration why you’re placing so many guidelines round your consuming. You may simply resolve that it’s not price it.

Tam: If somebody is studying this pondering “I do not need an issue with my alcohol consumption however need to take a extra conscious method to what I eat/drink,” what questions must be explored when fascinated about alcohol consumption? 

Krysty: One of many first issues we have to do is transfer away from the language round consuming and the idea that there are “downside drinkers” after which everybody else. This results in disgrace, stigma, and judgement.

A way more helpful, and lifelike, mannequin to make use of in terms of speaking about alcohol is the concept of consuming occurring on a spectrum. That’s the place the concept of “grey space drinker” emerged from, which encompasses everybody from the every-now-and-then drinker to those that are bodily hooked on alcohol. The great thing about this mannequin is that you simply don’t must hit any type of a all-time low earlier than you may discover your relationship with alcohol, you get to resolve at any level on the spectrum what’s best for you.

If you happen to’re able to get trustworthy with the position alcohol performs in your life, I’d recommend sitting down with a pen and paper and answering the next questions. Get interested by your self, and take the time to reply actually. Don’t cloud your responses with disgrace, or judgement, or what your bestie goes to suppose. That is about you and the one life that you’ve, and whether or not or not you need a poisonous substance to play a task within the creation of that life. 

Is alcohol nonetheless working for me?
How is alcohol making me really feel?
What areas of my life has alcohol taken over?
Does consuming align with the particular person I’m now?
What would “future you” inform “current you” on this state of affairs?

Tam: What if our mates have gone again to consuming after Dry January, however we try to proceed. Do you’ve got strategies/suggestions for make this a part of my life-style with my consuming mates? 

Krysty: You may want to search out new mates – haha. However, severely, if your folks actually respect and assist you within the choices you make in your life, then it shouldn’t be an issue. However, in the event that they’re frequently attempting to push you to begin consuming once more, whining that you simply’re not enjoyable anymore, or that one shot of tequila gained’t do any hurt, then you definitely may must rethink who you’re spending time with. It’s essential to determine for your self what you need to do with the time that you’ve, and the folks you spend it with. 

Moreover, in case your buddy group is closely immersed in consuming tradition – which means most social actions revolve round alcohol – then you definitely may want to search out some new peeps that love to do various things.

Tam: Any favourite “drink” hacks to switch that Friday evening cocktail? 

Krysty: I’m essentially the most fundamental sober particular person round – and I’m proud of consuming a seltzer on my sofa to unwind after a busy week. However, I do know that folks have totally different wants, and I get that within the early days of going alcohol-free you may want one thing slightly extra thrilling. Fortunately, the alcohol-free market is on fireplace! There are such a lot of merchandise in the marketplace – suppose flavored seltzers, glowing teas, alcohol-free beers, wines, and spirits, kombuchas – I actually might go on and on. I’m frequently impressed on the locations the place I discover alcohol-free drinks – Goal, Dealer Joe’s, Complete Meals, common grocery shops, and native alcohol-free bottle outlets are beginning to provide such all kinds. My solely warning is be intentional when utilizing alcohol-free merchandise, particularly issues like alcohol-free wine or beer. If you happen to’re downing a bottle of alcohol-free wine most nights of the week, it’s form of like ripping off one bandage and placing on one other, and also you may need to discover why you’re caught in the identical behaviors. 

Did you do Dry January this 12 months and preserve a dry or damp February? What’s your sober curious hack? ~ Tam